Hoot receives new SS Lelya in UPS this morning…
Here is the gun on the new shipping cardboard leaning against my fireplace, with me inspecting it: It this was not real, I could not “lean” it against my fireplace!
They now ship them stuck to a piece of cardboard with removable rubber adhesive, which keeps the rifle safe, and presents it in a lovely manner!
Here is the gun on the cardboard by itself:
Isn’t it nice! Don’t you ignorant mutts wish you were smart like me?
Note the shadow from the flash in the second picture. It is not present in the first picture, proving all this is very real!
I’m off to take my medications now…feeling a bit “distoriented”…. Likely low blood alcohol from all the excitement! Haven’t had time to drink breakfast yet!
Sincerest regards,
Kindly ‘Ol Uncle H 😯 😯 T
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Pure poetry Hoot! All you need is a little encouragement from us Australopithecines and the pins line up, the lock opens and you give to us, free of charge, verbal gunpowder. Like the classic concoction, there are three elements: wit, literacy and poetic allusion. In person, I’m guessing the sulfurous odor would also accompany the discharge.
So, while we rank below your caste, please consider our usefulness, kind of like a sewer snake or a laxative. We break up the clogs so you can flow freely.
By the way, flies are very nutritious. Ask anyone that works at Oscar Meyer. mmmm…Baloney.
About those shorts, going down a slope, balls forward?! Sounds like a great gift for aspiring altos.
Thank you, Loco for defending my right to combine latex and snow in a manner and fashion befitting my local customs and culture.
I know that the citizens of Norwegia also know of snow, and latex is used extensively in the Winter months for a variety of purposes, both indoors and out.
The comments of the common swine that frequent this forum have often offended my sensitivities. I accept that these deviate cretins have multiple rungs missing from their DNA, most are unable to reproduce their species, and more than a few have a “Wandering Eye”…those individuals that you never know which eyebulb to look into, when speaking to them. I’ve often thought it necessary for them to be legally bound to have an arrow tattooed on their face showing which is their primary visual occulant!
Suffice it to say…I have the patience of a Saint.
Whilst it is difficult for me to descend into this particular mental Hell, and associate with micro-wits, mental defecators, and men with not one, but two “low hangers”…it is the burden of those possessed of a higher mental plane, to wade through the detritus and scat of individuals cursed with dysfunctional small colons, and serve as shining examples, that these demented hunchbacks may someday aspire to breed above their station.
So, I say to you, international man of intrigue, conquest, education, station, and superior rifling, “Well and heartly said….”
Kindest regards,
‘Ol Uncle H 😯 😯 T
Leave the man alone. There are lots of people that are into Latex and other stuff……. 😉
(-and perfectly normal that they blame Santa for it…….!!!)
Cheers….. 😀
I have no idea where they came from, nor what they are for.
Each Christmas, we have a gift exchange that challenges the imagination of the giver. Those pants were the gift to me one year and I have no earthly idea except I think they are a “wearable snow sled” because they have three rubber runners down the backside to slide on.
I don’t believe the idea proved to be marketable. Except some fool bought at least one pair.
Hoot
All kidding aside Hoot…where in the name of human decency did you get those shorts from???? 😕
A worthy opponent….very impressive for a kid who almost choked to death three times from swallowing flies during class, because he’s a “mouth-breather!
Greatest respect and regards,
Kindly ‘Ol Uncle H 😯 😯 T
Hoot, your doctor, Dr. Pillman, wants you to come back to the office and give back that medication you grabbed from that patient as you ran out in your flashy red shorts. He said the Estrogen you swiped might lead to hallucinations and delirium if mixed with your Percocet/Morphine prescription, especially if you drink or do not drink alcoholic beverages.
The Coast Guard wants those pants back, too. Seems you’ve been trying to fool us: the “blowout-proof pantaloons” are actually “Fart-N-Float”, a prototype emergency flotation device designed specifically as an undergarment for passengers on Italian cruise ships. While ineffective on toddlers, mature test drowners successfully inflated the device, keeping them from sinking. (Not stinking, though)
Admiral Herndon said they need the pants back so a weight system can be worked out. Apparently, floating ass-up and face down is not only a good way to drown, it discourages rescue. He asks that you wash the pants in boiling detergent before returning.
Sorry to be delivering bad news. That’s why they say to not skip breakfast. At least you got two new Edguns; don’t try to fool us twice. We see the two pictures are different!
If you have trouble getting them off the cardboard mounts, try a Photoshop disk.
😆
HA!!!! Numbnutts….at least my tubes are 2.5″ long.
Small wonder you can’t get a date. You ever ask a midget out???
Kindest regards,
Senile ‘Ol Uncle H 😯 😯 T
hehe… he said tube….
😆
It’s actually a .25 caliber. Fills to 300 Bar, and has the new titanium “Triple Bypass” valve in it.
It’s called the “Lelya Dominatrix”…..
It has three pressure tubes vertically descending into the stock that “T” up with the main air tube. 100 shots @ a maximum of 950 fps with 44gr. Poly-Tip, Sierra Boat-Tail, Pre-Rifled, pellet design that just came out! They actually slide into the barrels rifle grooves when they load. A combo Moly/Graphite pellet coating assures Zero friction. I heard rumors that their off-brand label name will be “Putin’s Turds”.
Keep this to yourselves. This isn’t supposed to be public knowledge.
Shhhhhhhhhhh……
H 😯 😯 T
I can see your nuts. Blue Almond that is.
Nice gun! but I`m afraid you`ve made a fashion “faus pas” wearing
red with burgandy!
i think those are the new adult huggie diapers
they ship ’em with scopes, too?
(better double up on those meds. and wtf are you wearing?? – don’t answer that last question. i don’t really want to know.)
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Each Christmas, we have a gift exchange that challenges the imagination of the giver. Those pants were the gift to me one year and I have no earthly idea except I think they are a “wearable snow sled” because they have three rubber runners down the backside to slide on.
I don’t believe the idea proved to be marketable. Except some fool bought at least one pair.
Hoot
I discovered that the idea failed miserably on the global market…however, sales in San Francisco alone were enough to turn a profit for the year 😀