How to get $100 off your Edgun.

My uncle is a prick. Rip on him all you want. 😆
Maybe his 10/22 was as accurate as my EDgun….but, he wasn’t.
We’ll never know. He took his ball and went home.

My uncle saw me plucking sparrows off a wire at 40 yards. He said, “nice pellet gun.” I said, “Thanks.” He asked how much I paid for it. I told him. He told me what an idiot I was – for 1/4 that price I could have gotten a real rifle, like his “souped up” 10/22. I said, “I’ll spend my money however I like.” He asked, “You have enough to go spending $1500 on pellet guns, you want to put your money where your mouth is?” I never said it was better than his gun, but oh well… “What do you have in mind?”, I asked. “How many shots does that gun have in it?” I didn’t feel like explaining the recharging system to him, so I just said, “50”. He said, “Great! 100 yards – 50 shots each at a 3″ bullseye – placed over white paper. The one to miss the bullseye the most loses. Great, I said (knowing that I just hit my 2” plinking target 10 times in a row at 100 yards before he showed up).

We walked over to the “range” – basically a recently cut alfalfa field. And using a clipboard hung over a bird feeder hook to hold the target, we started the contest. He went first – and put 17 shots off the bullseye – taking a little less than 5 minutes to shoot 5 clips (he had enough clips to not have to reload).

I went next. The mosquitos were terrible in the alfalfa field. I asked if I could use some of his spray. He told me,”You should have brought your own.” I laughed. He didn’t. DICK!

So, I’m just about to squeeze the trigger on the first shot, and he says, “You have to shoot all 50 shots in less than 5 minutes because that’s what I did.” I called bullshit. He said he mentioned it earlier. Whatever…. (did I mention he is my least favorite uncle – I have never liked this guy – he bullied me all through my childhood).

So, I begin to shoot. Smack – smack – smack – target – target – target. I already know he’s dead by the first 5 shots. He tells me that he can see them going all over the paper through his scope. I know this isn’t the case. I settle into a rythm and start rattling off a shot every 3-4 seconds – ignoring the mosquitos bouncing against my legs, looking for a spot to sink their straw into me.

I finish with a minute to spare. We walk up – look at my target – he crumples up his target in his hand, shoves it in his pocket, says “F@#K YOU”, digs into his wallet, throws $100 cash on the ground, and walks away without another word.

This is what he saw….

Ed

Ed