Q:

Ted’s Holdover is killing me

I can’t wait to watch his bullpup review!!

When you guess he is gonna release it???

BullPup General Chat

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Viewing 15 replies - 121 through 135 (of 213 total)

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Hi Oldgoat!

We all wished….I mean “thought”, you was dead. :butkick: As regards the epistle you posted…allow me to offer a brief response….
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“That couldn’t be a picture of me; I have always had a full head of hair and I have had a foot long pony tail since I was 14. Still do.”

First off, this is pure horseshit. You and I both know the only thing a foot long on your alcohol soaked carcass are your hemorrhoids!
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“AND NO, NOT that kind of pony tail; you Arkansas hillbilly pervert! I am sure that you have had more than a few of the 4 legged ponytails and way more than a few muletails!”

What happens here in the mountains, ten miles from the hard road, stays in the mountains. You cannot prove a thing! Barnyard animals are not allowed to testify in a court of law! Besides, city-boy, how would you know how lonely it gets up here in the mountains????
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“I’m talking about natural hair that grows on my head.”

Again, I’m calling ‘horseshit’ on this statement. I happen to have friends in Springfield, IL and I pass through Lincoln, IL many times. The local barber, Leo, has told me many times that you pester him to shave your back and butt cheeks, the only place, besides your palms, where you can grow hair!
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“DON’T EVEN start on me and Betsy!”

First off, Betsy is a saint! Even for a cloven hoofed female, she puts up with your antics and demands with great patience. However, I’ll tell you this, my friend, she knows all about you stopping by the neighbor’s place, after a night of drunken debauchery, and corn-holing the neighbor’s hogs! Even in inter-species relationships…cheating is cheating!
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“I have also never been constipated. I drink way too much beer and I can sometimes be plagued with “The Hersheys Squirts”.”

Agreed! I can’t count the number of Lincoln residents who have told me you are so full of shit you often leave a trail of it behind you!
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“Now that I have cleared that up; back to the current subject. We all know that you shave off what little remaining hair that you have on your pointy head. Unless you also shave your balls: You might want to pick the pubic hairs out of the 1 day RED HOT PANTS aged, fromunda cheese flavored Fish Assholes, unless you think that the pubic hairs might add texture and that the pubic hairs might also help scrub your colon out.”

First off…at age 71 I NEED FIBER!!! Living on a fixed income, and proceeds from petty theft, it’s not easy to buy the fresh foods I need at the market. I’ll admit sometimes I have to resort to “home-grown” produce to supplement my diet!!! How dare you expose my extreme dietary needs. You know I lost my entire colon during the Great War from inhaling the Mustard Gas. Tragedy it was!!! I recall I was deep in the trenches, near Belleau Woods in the Winter of ’17, eating a French baguette, stuffed with veal and onions, and didn’t even realize I was swallowing the Mustard Gas because I thought it was mustard on the veal! Go ahead, ridicule a a hero, without whom you might well be speaking German today!
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Incidentally, did you know I visited your home and you were either gone, or too drunk to answer the door. Did you noticed how sticky the door knob was? Just my calling card for ‘friends’.

If we want to air dirty laundry…we all know you are a machinist! Why don’t you tell everyone about the time you almost MIG-welded your penis to your work table over at Catepillar, when, fortunately for you, the pork grease on your dick, from corn-holing the neighbor’s hogs, caught fire, and you got a Workers’ Compensation Settlement out of that??? Didn’t know I knew about that did you? People sometimes wondered where you got the money for those Edguns…well Berkshire breath, now they know!

As always, with kindest regards,

Kindly ‘Ol Uncle Hoot:

I am already waiting and watching as well. ..

but I bet you Uncle Hoot is still writing or collecting words or cooking something. .. :darth-vader:

Take place on your favorite Chair, have the Popcorn ready and some Beer on Ice …

quote oldgoat:

HOOT: That couldn’t be a picture of me….

WOW finally an interesting post…

Last time I stepped in a few months ago there were some Chupa-Chupa shooting marketing videos 🙁

As Ville, I’m impatient to read our Dearest Uncle Hoot’s reply on this… 😀

ATB

I need to see Hooters response on that one 🙂

HOOT: That couldn’t be a picture of me; I have always had a full head of hair and I have had a foot long pony tail since I was 14. Still do.

AND NO, NOT that kind of pony tail; you Arkansas hillbilly pervert! I am sure that you have had more than a few of the 4 legged ponytails and way more than a few muletails!

I’m talking about natural hair that grows on my head.

DON’T EVEN start on me and Betsy!

I have also never been constipated. I drink way too much beer and I can sometimes be plagued with “The Hersheys Squirts”.

Now that I have cleared that up; back to the current subject. We all know that you shave off what little remaining hair that you have on your pointy head. Unless you also shave your balls: You might want to pick the pubic hairs out of the 1 day RED HOT PANTS aged, fromunda cheese flavored Fish Assholes unless you think that the pubic hairs might add texture and that the pubic hairs might also help scrub your colon out.

NOT Judging, just sayn.

You Pervert! 😯

quote Reaper0d:

quote Leadbetter:

The roflcopter has landed [FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY]

no leadbetter. it just took off….

http://youtu.be/fNwOHac8Rnw

Nice!!

quote Leadbetter:

The roflcopter has landed [FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY]

no leadbetter. it just took off….

The roflcopter has landed [FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY]

quote donnyfl:

What were you doing eating strawberry shortcake in the first place? Ladies and gentleman that’s why us forum members are fat. We sit here all day checking the forums eating strawberry shortcakes and bon bons into the wee hours. I am guilty as well, got my bud light and frostless pop tarts 🙂 Yum!

quote SECoda:

I just spit my strawberry shortcake out and nearly hit the TV. Hoot: ‘s balls topic caught me by surprise.

quote oldgoat:

OK, I couldn’t help myself! I wouldn’t doubt that HOOT dumps an opened can into his Red hot pants and wears the pants for a day to add a little fromunda (from under his balls) cheese flavoring. 😯

oh man. the things and storys ive hear that start with, “i was drinking bud light” no story with good content EVER starts with that line. youve drowned yourself buddy. DROWNED. on the other hand, if you like redbull/vodka your most likely to end up inside some strangers asshole……. go figure. explains hoots recent adventure into the canned assholes

and this is in case anybody requests me to quote my sources………

20 Bartenders Reveal What Your Drink Says About You

Luckily, I had finished the whip cream before the cheese was mentioned or a may have been worse. :suprisedn:

What were you doing eating strawberry shortcake in the first place? Ladies and gentleman that’s why us forum members are fat. We sit here all day checking the forums eating strawberry shortcakes and bon bons into the wee hours. I am guilty as well, got my bud light and frostless pop tarts 🙂 Yum!

quote SECoda:

I just spit my strawberry shortcake out and nearly hit the TV. Hoot: ‘s balls topic caught me by surprise.

quote oldgoat:

OK, I couldn’t help myself! I wouldn’t doubt that HOOT dumps an opened can into his Red hot pants and wears the pants for a day to add a little fromunda (from under his balls) cheese flavoring. 😯

I just spit my strawberry shortcake out and nearly hit the TV. Hoot: ‘s balls topic caught me by surprise.

quote oldgoat:

OK, I couldn’t help myself! I wouldn’t doubt that HOOT dumps an opened can into his Red hot pants and wears the pants for a day to add a little fromunda (from under his balls) cheese flavoring. 😯

Oldgoat…as a constipated youth….begging for help, help from anyone, just a little help…yet, no one came….

“AAAAGGGHHH….PLEASE…PLEASE…SOMEONE SQUEEZE MY HEAD…SQUEEZE MY HEAD….I’M ALMOST THERE…HELP ME….PLEASE HELP ME!!!! JUST SQUEEZE MY HEAD!!!!”

Sadly, children…no one came to help. No one answered his screams for relief, as he tried to pass a turd the size of a football. His destiny was to suffer from hemorrhoids for the rest of his life! Huge, purple and red suckers, hanging halfway to his knees…all because no one would squeeze his head at the moment of truth!

Sadly….

Uncle Hoot:

ps: The moral that caused this unhappy tale, that stopped help from coming, was simply this: “If you lend a stranger a hand, you’re likely to get shit on!”

quote oldgoat:

Guys, I didn’t like the new format at first. I then noticed that the fourth line, at the top left of the screen, under the Talon Tunes banner, included a “View Unread Posts” link. I always click on that and all of the new posts pop up.

It makes it easy to find the newest posts without having to open every section just to find new posts.

I am not even going to comment on HOOT’s preferred foods!

OK, I couldn’t help myself! I wouldn’t doubt that HOOT dumps an opened can into his Red hot pants and wears the pants for a day to add a little fromunda (from under his balls) cheese flavoring. 😯

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ,,,,, :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

great reply my Edgun Brother Tedd,,, :rofl: :rofl: i am curios to know, from where my beloved Uncle Hoot: got that RED HOT PANTS ????

Viewing 15 replies - 121 through 135 (of 213 total)

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